Search Results: toddlers-are-a-holes

Toddlers Are A**holes

It's Not Your Fault

Author: Bunmi Laditan

Publisher: Workman Publishing

ISBN: 076118564X

Category: Family & Relationships

Page: 176

View: 1191

Presents a humorous guide to raising a toddler, covering such topics as feeding, potty-training, tantrums, managing the holidays, and "how not to die inside." --Publisher's description.

Toddlers Are A**holes

It's Not Your Fault

Author: Bunmi Laditan

Publisher: Workman Publishing

ISBN: 0761185755

Category: Humor

Page: 176

View: 1368

Toddler a**holery is a normal part of human development—not unlike puberty, except this stage involves throwing food on the floor and taking swings at people who pay your way in life. For parents of toddlers, it's a "you better laugh so you don't cry" period. Bunmi Laditan's hilarious, satirical guide to toddlerhood offers parents instant (and very welcome) comic relief—along with the very good news that "It's Not Your Fault." Chapters cover the cost of raising a toddler, feeding your toddler, potty-training, tantrums, how to manage the holidays, and "how not to die inside." Parents will see themselves in the very funny sections on taking your toddler to restaurants ("One parent will spend their time walking your toddler around the restaurant and outside like a cocker spaniel, while the other, luckier parent will eat alone."), Things You Thought You'd Never Say That You Now Say As a Parent of a Toddler ("I can tell you're pooping because your eyes are watering."), and how to order pizza ("Spend $40 on pizza delivery. Listen to your toddler cry for 30 minutes about how the pizza is all wrong. Watch your toddler take a small bite of crust. Google 'can anger give you a heart attack?' Start the bedtime routine."). Laditan's wildly funny voice has attracted hundreds of thousands of fans of Honest Toddler on social media; here she speaks parent-to-tired-parent, easing the pains and challenges of raising toddlers with a hefty dose of adult humor and wit.

How Toddlers Thrive

What Parents Can Do Today for Children Ages 2-5 to Plant the Seeds of Lifelong Success

Author: Tovah P Klein

Publisher: Simon and Schuster

ISBN: 147673514X

Category: Family & Relationships

Page: 320

View: 7777

Klein argues that adult success is often established in the developmental preschool years. She shares advice for parents on how to promote such success-driving positive attributes as resilience, self-regulation, and empathy.

Making the "Terrible" Twos Terrific!

Author: John Rosemond

Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing

ISBN: 1449420141

Category: Family & Relationships

Page: 194

View: 6581

Focusing on the developmental period spanning age eighteen to thirty-six-months, which renowned parenting expert John Rosemond dubs, “the twos,” Making the “Terrible” Twos Terrific! offers practical parenting advice to ensure that every child’s “twos” are terrific. By offering comprehensive tips on everything from toilet training to developing good habits for bedtime, as well as disciplinary techniques to control aggressive behaviors, Making the “Terrible” Twos Terrific! approaches parenting in a straightforward, accessible manner that is easy for parents to implement and achieve success with their toddlers. No bribing, meltdowns, nudging, or cajoling are necessary. All parents need is consistent, firm, and loving interactions with their toddler to guide him or her during the developmental years. The methods described by Rosemond also translate to success throughout other life endeavors such as school, relationship building, and even productivity in the distant tween and teen years. To ensure that earthquaking foot stomps, decibel-shattering screaming, and consistently stubborn behavior are not the norm for your toddler, consult Rosemond’s Making the “Terrible” Twos Terrific!.

Fowl Language

Welcome to Parenting

Author: Brian Gordon

Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing

ISBN: 1449479901

Category: Humor

Page: 128

View: 5908

Parenting can be a magical journey full of bliss and wonder . . . if you're on the right meds. For the rest of us, it's another thing altogether. Fowl Language Comics takes an unvarnished look at the tedium and aggravation of parenting, while never forgetting that the reason we put up with those little jerks is that we love them so damn much. By poking fun at the daily struggles parents face, these cartoons help all of us feel less alone in our continual struggle to stay sane. Brian Gordon, creator of Fowl Language Comics, has two small children of his own and knows well the trials and tribulations that go along with raising them. With more than eighteen years of experience in humorous illustration, writing, and cartooning, Brian's visual point of view is memorable, authentic, and instantly recognizable. From Brian: "They say 'write what you know.' Well, I don’t know much, but I do know what it’s like to be the father of two brilliant, beautiful, bat-shit-crazy kids." Launched in July 2013, the relatable humor of Fowl Language broke out on HuffPost Parents, Pop Sugar Moms, Bored Panda, Awkward Family Photos, and countless other humor and parenting blogs. Thanks to more than 200,000 fans on social media, including Facebook, Tumblr, and Instagram, it continues to grow in popularity at a rapid pace.

I Heart My Little A-Holes

A bunch of holy-crap moments no one ever told you about parenting

Author: Karen Alpert

Publisher: Harper Collins

ISBN: 0062341618

Category: Humor

Page: 304

View: 1996

Following the success of Go the F**k to Sleep, Confessions of a Scary Mommy, and Ketchup Is a Vegetable, a collection of funny, warm, and charmingly profane tales from the frontlines of parenthood by the author of the popular Baby Sideburns blog. Once upon a time you and your partner had a perfect life: dinners out, weekend mornings cuddling in bed, brunch with friends. Then you gave birth to a poop machine (or two). Now, it's all about the pediatrician, breast pumps, princess dresses, and minivans. And discovering that your pride and joy is actually a little A-hole. When your son wakes you up at 3:00 A.M. because he wants to watch Caillou, he's an a-hole. When your daughter outlines every corner of your living room with a purple crayon, she's an a-hole. When your rug rats purposely paint the kitchen ceiling with their smoothies, they're a-holes. At times like these, it's only natural to want to kill them (or yourself). But it's against the law (and there's the suicide hotline). Plus, there's that whole loving them more than anything in the whole world thing. In I Heart My Little A-Holes, Karen Alpert shares hilarious stories, lists, and deep thoughts on the joys and horrors of raising children. Accompanied by cheery illustrations and photos I Heart My Little A-Holes will make you laugh so hard you'll wish you were wearing a diaper.

The Honest Toddler

A Child's Guide to Parenting

Author: Bunmi Laditan

Publisher: Simon and Schuster

ISBN: 1476733724

Category: Humor

Page: 256

View: 9856

As seen on Good Morning America, the irreverent, bracingly honest, and “awfully funny” (The Boston Globe) satirical parenting guide from the Internet’s most infamous tot, whose unchecked sense of entitlement and undeniable charm have captivated hundreds of thousands of fans. Are you the confused parent of a toddler? Are you constantly disappointing the 2T in your life? Are you tired, stressed out, and looking for relief? I can’t help you with that last one, but if you want to become an A+ servant to your small child, this book is for you. Who better to teach you about toddlers than another toddler? In this book you’ll learn: • How time-outs make you look like a fool • Why potty training is not only unnecessary but unrealistic for children under eighteen • Why toddler beds are OUT and letting your child sleep on the diagonal in your bed is IN • The best way to apologize to your toddler for all of those Pinterest casseroles • That when you love someone, you accept them as they are, pants or no pants The hard-hitting knowledge in The Honest Toddler will save you thousands of dollars in unnecessary whole grains and toothbrushes. Happy reading. You’re doing the right thing. For once.

Grow Up!

Author: Nina Laden

Publisher: Chronicle Books

ISBN: 9780811837613

Category: Juvenile Fiction

Page: 26

View: 2173

Rhymes tell what some babies grow up to be.

Assholes

A Theory

Author: Aaron James

Publisher: Anchor

ISBN: 0385535686

Category: Philosophy

Page: 240

View: 7061

In the spirit of the mega-selling On Bullshit, philosopher Aaron James presents a theory of the asshole that is both intellectually provocative and existentially necessary. What does it mean for someone to be an asshole? The answer is not obvious, despite the fact that we are often personally stuck dealing with people for whom there is no better name. Try as we might to avoid them, assholes are found everywhere—at work, at home, on the road, and in the public sphere. Encountering one causes great difficulty and personal strain, especially because we often cannot understand why exactly someone should be acting like that. Asshole management begins with asshole understanding. Much as Machiavelli illuminated political strategy for princes, this book finally gives us the concepts to think or say why assholes disturb us so, and explains why such people seem part of the human social condition, especially in an age of raging narcissism and unbridled capitalism. These concepts are also practically useful, as understanding the asshole we are stuck with helps us think constructively about how to handle problems he (and they are mostly all men) presents. We get a better sense of when the asshole is best resisted, and when he is best ignored—a better sense of what is, and what is not, worth fighting for.

1-2-3 Parenting with Heart

Three-Step Discipline for a Calm and Godly Household

Author: Thomas Phelan,Chris Webb

Publisher: Sourcebooks, Inc.

ISBN: 1492653039

Category: Religion

Page: 304

View: 2244

Based on the bestselling parenting book, 1-2-3 Magic, and adapted for a Christian lifestyle In 1-2-3 Parenting with Heart, Dr. Thomas W. Phelan and pastor Chris Webb teach Christian parents to take charge while refraining from yelling, leading to better behaved children, happier parents, and a more peaceful home environment. Complete with relevant Bible verses, explanations, and exercises, this guide allows you to get back in charge of your home and enjoy your kids again by helping you set limits for your children, and by breaking down the complex task of parenting into three straightforward steps: • Controlling Obnoxious Behavior: Learn an amazingly simple technique to get the kids to STOP doing what you don't want them to do (whining, arguing, tantrums, sibling rivalry, etc.). • Encouraging Good Behavior: Learn several effective methods to get your kids to START doing what you want them to do (picking up, eating, going to bed-and staying there!, chores, etc.). • Strengthening Your Relationships: Learn powerful techniques that reinforce the bond between you and your children. You'll find tools to use in virtually every situation, including advice for common problems such as: • Whining • Sibling rivalry • Reluctance to do chores • Talking back • Refusing to go to bed or getting up in the middle of the night • Stubbornness For years, millions of parents from all over the world have used the award-winning 1-2-3 Magic program to help them raise happier, healthier families and put the fun back into parenting.

Three-Year-Olds Are A**holes

Author: Sarah Fader

Publisher: Osiris Ink

ISBN: 9781941065174

Category:

Page: N.A

View: 1266

Once upon a time Sarah Fader wrote a blog post called 3-Year-Olds Are Assholes. It went viral on HuffPost Parents with over 400,000 shares on Facebook. This book tells the story of three-year-old Samantha, who is determined to make a rainbow. It features illustrations by Shari Ryan.

Becoming Brilliant

What Science Tells Us about Raising Successful Children

Author: Roberta M. Golinkoff,Kathy Hirsh-Pasek

Publisher: American Psychological Association (APA)

ISBN: 9781433822391

Category: Child development

Page: 344

View: 1492

Today's children will forge careers that look nothing like those their parents and grandparents knew. Even the definitions of "career" and "job" are changing as people create new businesses and services. Although these changes are well underway, our education system in the U.S. lags behind and still subscribes to the idea that content is king. This exclusive focus on content is reflected in what we test, how we teach, and even the toys we offer our children. Employers want to hire excellent communicators, critical thinkers, and innovators-in short, they want brilliant people. So what can we do, as parents, to help our children be brilliant and successful? Golinkoff and Hirsh-Pasek provide a science-based framework for how we should be teaching children in and outside of school. Using fun and engaging examples, the authors introduce the 6Cs-collaboration, communication, content, critical thinking, creative innovation, and confidence-along with tips to optimize children's development in each area. These skills will make up the straight-A report card for success in the 21st century. Book jacket.

Mary Had a Little Lamb

Author: Iza Trapani

Publisher: Charlesbridge

ISBN: 1607345544

Category: Juvenile Fiction

Page: 28

View: 6702

Everyone knows the story of Mary and her little lamb with fleece as white as snow. But what happens one day when the lamb decides to go off alone? Fans of Iza Trapani will delight as this adorable little lamb wanders across the farm, meeting an assortment of equally appealing characters. From a big brown horse to a tough old goose to a pen full of happy pigs, children will laugh out loud as Mary's little lamb stumbles from one mess to the next in this fun-filled rhyming adventure.

Clinical Practice of Cognitive Therapy with Children and Adolescents

The Nuts and Bolts

Author: Robert D. Friedberg,Jessica M. McClure

Publisher: Guilford Publications

ISBN: 1462519806

Category: Psychology

Page: 494

View: 6437

Widely regarded as the definitive practitioner reference and teaching text, this book provides a complete introduction to doing cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) with 6- to 18-year-olds. The authors offer a blueprint for formulating cases and tailoring treatment to each child's or adolescent's unique developmental and clinical needs. Coverage includes how to orient children and families to cognitive therapy, structure each session, and implement a wide range of CBT techniques. Rich case material illustrates ways that CBT can help children struggling with specific emotional and behavioral problems. Reproducible forms and handouts can be downloaded and printed in a convenient 8 1/2" x 11" size. New to This Edition *Incorporates the latest advances in CBT with youth and gives increased attention to cultural issues, including new case examples. *Chapter on working with patients with autism spectrum disorder. *Chapter on cognitive-behavioral family therapy. *Pull-out boxes throughout that summarize key points. *Epilogue on developing clinical wisdom. See also the authors' "Cognitive Therapy Techniques for Children and Adolescents: Tools for Enhancing Practice," which presents creative ways to address challenging problems.

Grow Up

Author: Sandy Turner

Publisher: Joanna Cotler

ISBN: 9780060009540

Category: Juvenile Fiction

Page: 40

View: 817

A young boy imagines many possibilities when asked what he wants to be when he grows up.

The Very Hungry Caterpillar

Author: Eric Carle

Publisher: Penguin

ISBN: 1524739553

Category: Juvenile Fiction

Page: 26

View: 1470

The all-time classic picture book, from generation to generation, sold somewhere in the world every 30 seconds! Have you shared it with a child or grandchild in your life? For the first time, Eric Carle’s The Very Hungry Caterpillar is now available in e-book format, perfect for storytime anywhere. As an added bonus, it includes read-aloud audio of Eric Carle reading his classic story. This fine audio production pairs perfectly with the classic story, and it makes for a fantastic new way to encounter this famous, famished caterpillar.

Confessions of a Domestic Failure

A Humorous Book About a not so Perfect Mom

Author: Bunmi Laditan

Publisher: MIRA

ISBN: 1488022887

Category: Fiction

Page: 400

View: 5736

Instant Bestseller From the creator of The Honest Toddler comes a fiction debut sure to be a must-read for moms everywhere There are good moms and bad moms—and then there are hot-mess moms. Introducing Ashley Keller, career girl turned stay-at-home mom who's trying to navigate the world of Pinterest-perfect, Facebook-fantastic and Instagram-impressive mommies but failing miserably. When Ashley gets the opportunity to participate in the Motherhood Better boot camp run by the mommy-blog-empire maven she idolizes, she jumps at the chance to become the perfect mom she's always wanted to be. But will she fly high or flop? With her razor-sharp wit and knack for finding the funny in everything, Bunmi Laditan creates a character as flawed and lovable as Bridget Jones or Becky Bloomwood while hilariously lambasting the societal pressures placed upon every new mother. At its heart, Ashley's story reminds moms that there's no way to be perfect, but many ways to be great.

Why Love Matters

How affection shapes a baby's brain

Author: Sue Gerhardt

Publisher: Routledge

ISBN: 1317635795

Category: Family & Relationships

Page: 318

View: 1130

Why Love Matters explains why loving relationships are essential to brain development in the early years, and how these early interactions can have lasting consequences for future emotional and physical health. This second edition follows on from the success of the first, updating the scientific research, covering recent findings in genetics and the mind/body connection, and including a new chapter highlighting our growing understanding of the part also played by pregnancy in shaping a baby’s future emotional and physical well-being. Sue Gerhardt focuses in particular on the wide-ranging effects of early stress on a baby or toddler’s developing nervous system. When things go wrong with relationships in early life, the dependent child has to adapt; what we now know is that his or her brain adapts too. The brain’s emotion and immune systems are particularly affected by early stress and can become less effective. This makes the child more vulnerable to a range of later difficulties such as depression, anti-social behaviour, addictions or anorexia, as well as physical illness. Why Love Matters is an accessible, lively, account of the latest findings in neuroscience, developmental psychology and neurobiology – research which matters to us all. It is an invaluable and hugely popular guide for parents and professionals alike.

My Dream Playground

Author: Kate M. Becker,Jed Henry

Publisher: Candlewick Press

ISBN: 0763655317

Category: Juvenile Fiction

Page: 32

View: 8078

Dreaming of a day when there will be a real playground in her own neighborhood, a little girl is ecstatic when she learns that a local playground has been planned, in a story inspired by the construction of the first playground built by the KaBOOM! national nonprofit.

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