For fans of AMC's The Walking Dead, Max Brooks, and all things zombies, the clever creators of Fifty Shades of Chicken hack a new parody cookbook filled with snacks for every occasion, tips for cooking under duress, and a love story that will send ripples down your spine--all accompanied by food photography that will ignite your palate. At the heart of this cookbook is Pam Beaumont, who must fight the dead and feed the living. The apocalypse is no picnic, but she survives on quick bites—and on her love for Daryl, a backwoods badass with a crossbow who reminds her that she has more than one appetite. From brain food to finger food, and from sticky sweets to killer cocktails, the 50 recipes in this cookbook parody are guaranteed to grab you. The zombies have their snack plan—do you have yours? Snacks include: Sweetish Fleshballs Nachos of the Living Dead Elbows Casserole Crabby Prepper Puffs Survivalist Hero Dire Ham Biscuits Cold-Blooded Ice Cream Sandwiches Gratuitous Violence Jello Mold and more.
A “Dead is the New Fabulous” Mystery (#3) “Lindsay Maracotta has created in Lucy an exhilarating smart and sassy character. Her insider’s take crackles with fresh insight and laugh-out-loud one-liners.” —Janet Evanovich, #1 New York Times Bestselling Author “Killingly amusing. Lindsay Maracotta wields the sharpest tongue since Nora Ephron banged out Heartburn. The book’s social observations are right on the money.” —The Chicago Tribune Lucy Frampton lives amid the glitzy trappings of Los Angeles. Her friends enjoy intimate relationships with aroma therapists and body sculptors, and her neighbors' estates boast screening rooms and humidity-controlled wine cellars. The exclusive Windermere Academy, which her daughter, Chloe, attends, has a shrink on the payroll to lead "encounter sessions" when tiny tempests threaten the students' sunny days. And even bit players in the Windermere school pageants have publicists and agents. But Lucy, a sensible, transplanted Midwesterner, keeps her sights down-to-earth. She's an outstanding mom, a sexy wife, and an animator whose career is rocketing. But then, in a flash, her perfect world of storyboard mornings and car-pool afternoons goes from romantic comedy to film noir. Lucy's new nanny, Brandon, college friend—and onetime lover (but that's another story)—is shot dead while driving her husband's car. It's unclear who the intended victim was, but then Lucy stumbles upon something even more chilling: a video hidden among Brandon's things that shows a child committing a murder. Though the authorities yawn, Lucy suspects the killer is cruising through classrooms and lunchrooms, as dewy-eyed innocent as any other kid. With a razor wit and a hilarious irreverence for the trappings of fame as her only weapons, Lucy launches a one-woman investigation, leading smack into the looking-glass world of child actors, where nine-year-olds can fire their own parents, where a child's smile commands top dollar—and a little killer is about to have the last laugh!
WINNER OF THE NATIONAL BOOK CRITICS CIRCLE AWARD. A couple lie naked in the dunes at Baritone Bay, at the spot where, almost thirty years before, they had first had sex as students. Nostalgia has sent Celice and Joseph back to their singing stretch of coast, but in the seeming calm of the afternoon they meet a brutal and unexpected fate – one which will still their bodies but not their love, and certainly not their story. Winner of the National Book Critics Circle Award A couple lie naked in the dunes at Baritone Bay, at the spot where, almost thirty years before, they had first had sex as students. Nostalgia has sent Celice and Joseph back to their singing stretch of coast, but in the seeming calm of the afternoon they meet a brutal and unexpected fate – one which will still their bodies but not their love, and certainly not their story.
Can a lack of self love make a woman self-destruct? Does a woman's past really dictate her present? Are "loose" women only as deep as the make-up they wear? Meet Isis Reynolds. She's young, pretty, and smart, but has a lot to learn about relationships. In her quest for love, she's developed an "easy" reputation, earning disrespect from men, and hatred from women. Through it all, she strives to repair her relationship with God while fighting off the demons of her past and struggling to be the rock for her friend, Kendra, who struggles with the realization that she's gay, and her sister, Cleopatra, who moves in with her boyfriend and tries to hide it from their parents. On top of it all, Isis quickly marries Vincent, who doesn't seem to be as comfortable with his new wife's past as he claims to be. As Isis' world seems to fall apart around her, she learns there are no easy answers to life's questions.
Will Self possesses one of the greatest literary imaginations of any writer working today. How the Dead Live is his most extraordinary book yet—a novel that will challenge, entertain, and truly astonish. Lily Bloom is an aging American transplanted to England who has lost her battle with cancer and lies wasting away at the Royal Ear Hospital. As her two daughters—lumpy Charlotte, who runs a hugely successful chain of stationery stores called Waste of Paper, and beautiful Natasha, a junkie—buzz around her and the nurses pump her full of morphine, Lily slides in and out of the present, taking us on a surreal, opinionated trip through the stages of a lifetime of lust and rage. A career girl in the 1940s, a sexed-up, tippling adulteress in the 1950s and ‘60s, a divorced PR flak in the 1970s and ‘80s, Lily presents us with a portrait of America and England over sixty years of riotous and unreal change. And then it’s over: Lily catches a cab with the aboriginal wizard Phar Lap Jones, her guide to the shockingly banal world of the dead. It’s a world that is surreal but familiar, where she again works in PR and rediscovers how great smoking is, where her cohabitants include Rude Boy, the son who died at age nine and now swears a blue streak, and three eyeless, murmuring wraiths, the Fats—composed of the pounds, literally the whole selves, she lost and gained over her lifetime. As Lily settles into her nonexistence, the most difficult challenge for this staunchly difficult woman is how to understand that she’s dead, and how to leave the rest behind. How the Dead Live is an unforgettable portrait of the human condition, the struggle with life and with death. It’s a novel that will disturb and provoke, the work, in the words of one British reviewer, “of a novelist writing at the height of his powers.”
The long-awaited sequel to The Phoenix Guards and Five Hundred Years After Two hundred years after Adron's Disaster, in which Dragaera City was accidentally reduced to an ocean of chaos by an experiment in wizardry gone wrong, the Empire isn't what it used to be. Deprived at a single blow of their Emperor, of the Orb that is the focus of the Empire's power, of their capital city with its Impe-rial bureaucracy, and of a great many of their late fellow citizens, the surviving Dragaerans have been limping through a long Interregnum, bereft even of the simple magic and sorcery they were accustomed to use in everyday life. Now the descendants and successors of the great ad-venturers Khaavren, Pel, Aerich, and Tazendra are growing up in this seemingly diminished world, con-vinced, like their elders, that the age of adventures is over and nothing interesting will ever happen to them. They are, of course, wrong . . . . For even deprived of magic, Dragaerans fight, plot, and conspire as they breathe, and so do their still-powerful gods. The enemies of the Empire prowl at its edges, in-scrutable doings are up at Dzur Mountain...and, unex-pectedly, a surviving Phoenix Heir, young Zerika, is discovered—setting off a chain of swashbuckling events that will remake the world yet again. At the Publisher's request, this title is being sold without Digital Rights Management Software (DRM) applied.
When the first Elvis impersonator is found slumped over his piano, a heart attack seems the likely suspect. But when a second keels over mid-swagger at Callie Valentine Jones's party, suspicious minds begin to wonder if something foul is afoot. Because everyone knows two dead Elvis impersonators add up to only one thing: murder. As it turns out, Callie's cousin Lovie--a 190-pound bombshell who's had more lovers than the King had hit records--turns out to be suspect #1. Callie knows she's innocent but to prove it, she and Lovie will have to find out who the real killer is. It's a mystery fit for a King, and with a little help from Callie's hunk-a-burnin' love ex Jack, and her talented hound dog Elvis--who's convinced he's the true reincarnation of the King--Callie and Lovie are determined to have the killer singing Jailhouse Rock. But they need to move fast and be ready for the killer's next move, because their chance may be now. . .or never! "Another crazy, fast-paced mystery sure to leave cozy fans chuckling and waiting for the next adventure." --Booklist "Webb's sly sense of humor and neatly plotted mystery is laugh-out-loud hilarious." --Romantic Times